Monday blues

Its been a while that i’ve written something.

Let me rephrase that,

Something meaningful,

aside from my frequent array of short excerpts and silly blogs.

Lately, it seems as if i’ve been hiding in all the wrong places

Engaging in the wrong activities.

I’ve recently found myself pondering on the idea

Of change

Not the good type of change, if there is such

But the type where you cant simply click an undo button

or rewind back to where you came from.

A loss of touch with my identity perhaps,

Where its come down to the ultimate question of who am I becoming

To where i want to go.

Its been a while since i’ve last felt this way

It could be the excessive quantity of alcohol

I’ve ingested the past couple of days,

Or the loss of brain cells due to the

amount of times I’ve been out past 3 am getting high.

I’ve been running,

But which direction?

It depends on who you’d ask.

My mother and father would simply answer south

My dealers, north

Way up high

My friends, North West, maybe East South

Whichever way our drunk minds will allow us to.

Sorry, didn’t mean to drive your brain in circles solving riddles.

The point is, someone knows

And soon, I will to

Wether i find the answer in the bottom of my next spirit over the rocks

Or inbetween the ashes of my rolled up spliff.

If I’m lucky, hopefully in my dreams

when i finally get some sleep.

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Lost 

The fisherman who searched to be lostlived adrift in the greatest massiveness of Earth’s offers

He replaced his every worry with the flick of a pole,

Allowing the empty sea to feed off his sorrows

In the dark dismal emptiness

Completely unaware of the reality

of the eternal deepness

underlying his very own inconsequential presence

But he wasn’t alone

The company of an occasional whistle of a boat,

and the lighthouse blaze

Were his solemn reminders

of the beauty in the often unacknowledged

The ocean breathed his perpetual sublime

And the bracing wind craving his deliberation

At the verge of its every touch

Revived the fishermen’s most vivacious sensations

Reminding him of what it meant to feel alive

The salty aroma, his drug

And the invigorating breeze, his savior

The lone fisherman searched to be lost

And in that,

He was lost

And found himself

In his own presence